A Story About Mental Illness

A Serious Post

TODAY'S RAMBLINGS

4 Minute Read

I wrote what follows 2 years ago. At the time, I decided against its publication, mostly for the privacy of the person in question, someone I’ve known for 37 years.

I suppose that’s still an issue, but as you’ll see, it would be difficult for someone unfamiliar with this story to determine its subject. And when I found and reread the draft recently, I felt the topic required exposure.

If you know my friend or even if you don’t, I hope you’ll consider the plight he and the many like him face.

---

There's no way around it: Today's blog is a downer. I mean like a real fucking downer.

The only good part is that it might remind you of your own good fortune. It also vividly illustrates the dreadful state of America's physical and mental healthcare system, at least if you're poor and/or outside of it.

This is the story of one of my and Julie's oldest friends - we met him in Albuquerque in the late 1980s. I will share [now heavily edited] pictures of him, yet he will remain anonymous as John Doe, out of respect for his privacy and dignity.

Because my friend is now homeless and by this non-professional's observation, psychotic.

I don't say that lightly and again, if my friend weren't already deep in the criminal justice system - by his own doing, and with another 44 days in jail recently - I would never - ever - share this kind of personal information here, even anonymously. But John's case is on the public record, and I assure you I take no pleasure in this [still don’t].

Because JFC what follows could happen to me, you, or anyone.

When my friend John Doe was at his peak, he was among the first people I got to know that I wanted to emulate him and his lifestyle. John had a new Audi 5000, a very lucrative consulting business in the defense industry, a sweet wife, and an even sweeter home in one of the most desirable places to live in New Mexico.

We went on to become great friends, and we've stayed in touch over many years. He and his then-wife were at our wedding in 1991 - two of only 39 guests.

His 40th birthday on Lake Powell in 1997 is still to this day one of our best trips, and his 50th glamping on Santa Catalina Island (he rode his Jet Ski from the mainland!) was almost as good.

Yet over the years, his behavior grew disturbing. Now, John was always unique and had an interesting perspective on things. Worryingly though, in the early 2000s, he started talking about his growing predilection for Ambien.

But he never seemed mentally ill, at least no more than any of us. Plus, John was for many years the definition of a larger-than-life character: avid outdoorsman, gear and toy aficionado, and a fine chef. Taking an occasional prescribed pill to help sleep didn't seem extreme.

But I began to be a bit more concerned when he invested in an upscale restaurant in Albuquerque in the late 1990s and proceeded to sue his partners shortly thereafter. This was around then.

But that was nothing.

Soon, he was battling with his neighbors in his luxurious New Mexico enclave - each home site is an acre - about a hum and glare coming from their solar panels. When I say it escalated, I'm talking fucking rocket ships, because he eventually had physical altercations with his neighbors that led to him being jailed.

Everything completely unraveled from there and he lost everything - mostly because of his wildly litigious demeanor. John is nothing if not competitive, and that mixed with mental illness brought his downfall, in several courts and otherwise.

To my knowledge, his illness has gone untreated. The outcome of that has not been good.

A few months back, we attended a mutually close friend's birthday party, and John was there. So while we had heard the stories of his multiple jailings and his homelessness, we had not seen him in person in a few years.

To know he's homeless, to see him like this, yet to hear the same unmistakable John Doe baritone completely and totally gutted both of us. The rational and intelligent tone of his voice completely belied the widespread delusions he shared with us.

I walked away and sobbed.

But - and it's a very big but - I would not have written any of this if John hadn't reached out to me in December [2022] via phone, while I was in Metro NYC. The call was awful.

Because John sounded just fine - as above. But he then told me his "imminent lawsuit win" specifically included that his opposition's attorneys must file all of the paperwork necessary for him to run for President of the United States. John believes [believed] he's going to win the 2024 Presidential election and was calling to ask me to be his manager and Julie his administration's chief of staff when he wins.

This was after he requested I be his majordomo in planning and directing a luxurious cruise around the world for him and his closest friends, including us. Which will be in celebration of his upcoming lawsuit settlement, which John said will “run into the tens of millions of dollars.”

I did my best to be supportive of John during our call. I thanked him for asking us both to participate but encouraged him to win first. I then tried to change the subject to his health.

The answers were not good and involved 3 trips to an emergency room at the University of California at Irvine to get care for a chronic neck ailment. I asked him to stay sheltered and safe, and then I asked him if he was getting any mental health care; I told him I've been to a psychologist myself on occasion (which is of course true) to try to defuse the subject.

He told me he had made 3 different attempts to get into the system, and he was unsuccessful.

So my friend had to go to an ER for a serious orthopedic condition and he can't get mental health care at all.

Many know I've taken a decidedly less politically strident stance here, but that just is not right. Not in the United States and not in 2023 [or 2025].

Thank you for reading this. I have only love and hope for a better future for our friend John. Please remember the importance of mental - in addition to physical - health.

And perhaps that we must do better to help our fellow citizens. Fellow citizens like my friend John Doe.

Because if this can happen to him, it can happen to me or you.

---

Sadly, the latest news we have on our friend John is that he remains homeless, in Southern California. And also delusional: He remains under the impression he’ll be moving back into his home in New Mexico any day now.

FROM THE UNWASHED MASSES

Thank you for reading this newsletter.

KLUF

Yes, mental health is important and always has been.